We get many many sales calls promising the “next big thing” in sex toys. If we happen to politely refuse the salesperson’s kind offer, he sometimes becomes belligerent (why, this just happened to me yesterday), trying to bully us into accepting a catalog and exhorting “don’t you want to make money?”
Okay, side note, does the bullying tactic EVER work? I equate it with the creepy-guy-in-the-street come-on lines.
I see I have digressed. My point is this: there are so precious few “next big things.” Most of these NBTs are, at best, bizarre, and at worst, well… even more bizarre, I guess. And so, in that vein, I’ve actually brought you all here today to show you some crazy patent applications for dildos. Strange, futuristic, terrifying dildos. I’m just trying to imagine walking up to the US Patent Office with some of these blue prints in hand. This blows the Lick-a-Lotta-Puss out of the water. Enjoy.
