Today I read two articles: one about a doctor practicing female genital mutilation on young girls at Cornell University, and the other on the development of a pill to increase women’s sex drive. I could write pages on either of these articles, but I’ll stick to the point: both of these stories are the result of a culture that pressures women to conform to a narrow representation of healthy female bodies and sexuality, and pathologizes anyone who does not fit.
Under-researched pills that make billions of dollars for drug companies, creams that dehydrate the vagina or numb the anus and cause tears and infections, harsh douches and perfumes, genital plastic surgery, and unconsentual mutilation of young girls. These are the dangerous practices that individuals who feel pressure to be “normal” fall prey to. But how can we blame anyone for feeling inadequate when mainstream porn, drug companies, and doctors like Poppas are all telling us the same thing: if your tiny pink pussy doesn’t get wet (but not too wet) at the drop of a hat, there is something terribly wrong with you.
Seriously? Maybe today’s instant-gratification culture also plays into our susceptibility to quick fix pills, creams, and surgeries. I just answered a call that went something like this:
Do you have a something to help make it feel better for a man and a woman?
What sort of something?
Pills. To make the sex feel better for a man and a woman.
I’m sorry, we don’t carry pills. They don’t work.
We get a few of those calls every day. I wish I had more time to talk to him. Here’s what I would say: Take some time with each other. Ask her what she fantasizes about and tell her what turns you on. Play. Give some love to her entire body: kiss behind her knees, massage her feet. Use plenty of glycerine free lube, and invest in a vibrator. Try a butt toy or cockring if you want to amp things up a bit. Our bodies are amazing and can bring us all sorts of pleasure if we just learn to accept them.
